Hi everyone,

I've been a member of Traineo for a long time, but I haven't read/posted on the forums much. I was hoping that y'all could help me with a problem I've been having recently.

My boyfriend and I are working together to lose weight. He seems to have a much easier time than I do. Frequently when we've had a mediocre week I've gained a bit or stayed flat, but he still managed to lose weight. I know I shouldn't let it bother me but it does. It makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong and I can't figure out what it would be. We eat the same food, go to the gym together, etc. so it seems really unfair that he loses when I gain.

Yesterday when this happened again I got really upset and depressed, and it made him feel awful too, which isn't good.

Any ideas on how I can get this to stop bothering me? It will probably get even worse because he's pretty close to his goal (within 20 lbs), while I'm still way off mine.

Thanks,
Julia

Well the sad thing is guys usually lose weight faster than women.

If you eat the same portions and exercise the same amount, I'd bet you'd see the guy still lose more.

Stay at it. Look at what your eating and how much you are eating. Is you food plan clean of junk food, soda, etc? How often do you eat? Are you eating heavy before bed?

For your exercise, what kind of exercises are you doing? Whats your frequency and intensity?

Let us know and we can help some more from there

Julia, this exact same thing happened to me. It's just the way it is. My hubby (b/f at the time) switched from regular sodas to diet sodas and started a light exercise program (literally that's all he changed) and he lost 30 lbs within a couple of months.

Another time, we started being healthy together and I was actually eating better than him. He still lost more weight more easily than I did. It can be really frustrating especially for someone who is competitive (as in me). So really you just have to let that go. It's just going to be easier for him.

We have just recently started being healthy "together" again, but he will probably start losing weight much more quickly than me and I have been at this for 6 months now. Fortunately, this time I can remind myself that I'm in much better shape than him even if he does start dropping weight like crazy.

One last note, if he is bigger than you, he will be able to eat more food than you. If you are eating the same size portions of the same food, then he will lose more. Heavier people require more calories just to maintain. Also, heavier people burn more calories when working out or doing anything actually. So keep that in mind. I also have to remind myself that hubby should eat more than me.

Good luck on you healthy lifestyle!!

Ditto. Unfortunately typical women should generally only eat about 70-80% of what a typical man eats.

Are you an apple or a pear?

Those who are apple-shaped, fat around the midsection, are able to lose weight much easier when they're on a low-carb (low-glycemic) diet.

If you're a pear shape, fat around hips and thighs, then a low-glycemic diet does not have as much of an effect as it has on apple-shaped individuals.

From what I've gathered, most men are apples and most women are pears.

Here are a couple of links.

http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/2007-05-15-die t-types_N.htm
http://www.healthandage.com/public/health-center/2 2/article/3242/Diets-for-Apples-and-Pears.htm

Grrr I know exactly how you feel, it's so annoying and unfair!!! My fiancee just seems to stay in shape permanently even though he does next to nothing to maintain it... Like for example I have been building up the amount of running that I can do for MONTHS and a couple of weeks ago he said 'Oh I'll come along' and did a 10k run with me even though he hadn't run in years. Sickening.

Also he eats anything he wants and never gains weight. But they just have more muscle and seem to keep their muscle once they have it which, along with being bigger in general, means they can eat more than us... not a lot can be done about it short of a sex change perhaps???

But as Rachael said you will probably be in better shape (and healthier on the inside!) in the long run

When my hubby and I did Weight Watchers together, the same thing used to happen to us. It was frustrating and sad at time especially since he weighed less than me. Men lose faster. Just the way it is.

Try to think of your progress, your better eating, your pounds off and your fitness progress as opposed to yours versus his. It is hard but pat yourself on back more often.

Julia, do not be discouraged. Remember that it is way easier for a man to lose weight and stay fit than it is for a woman. Although I am all for losing weight naturally with a healthy diet and exercise, I did try Slimquick for Women. I used it here and there, and I saw a difference in my body. I do not use it now, but continue with my healthier diet and exercise.
Keep up the good work and GOOD LUCK!

Oh, I did not know that. THANKS!

How much you need to eat is based on how much you weigh. And even if there is a man and a woman with exact same weight, height, BF, age, ect. Probably the man is still going to be able to eat more than the woman.

I wonder if there is a biological reason for this...

It's part of the unwritten punishment for eating the apple first...

"You shall gain weight faster, lose it slower and care about it way more than your husband ever will... unless he decides to mention how heavy you look, at which point he'll care alot after he gets his head handed to him.... Go forth and be fruitful and multiply (which btw I'm going to add some weight you can't lose after that also).