Hi Traineo Guys,

I know a guy who is around 16 and a half stone, at about 6'1" and is desperately keen to get in shape. However, I think he is lacking in belief and whenever he starts a new regime it generally doesn't last long before he quits. Though he is still hungry to keep trying, so deep down I know he wants change (which is why I questioned his 'belief').

He runs his own business and works hard while raising a family. I often take for granted how motivated I am, so in this situation my abundance of enthusiasm is not rubbing off onto him, so what do you think I could do/ say to help this guy hit his goals?

Any motivation tips that get him moving in the right direction will be huge.

Thanks

well, from here, it looks like the most convincing thing you can do to inspire him is to stick with your own weightloss program (JUDDD?) so that you obviously are successful at achieving a goal for better health. When he sees that you can do it, he may become interested and be willing to try it.

Sometimes the most effective way to influence a friend or relative is to live your "sermon" rather than to speak it.

(I know I must sound hopelessly provincial, but please remind me: how many pounds in a "stone"? )

Have you ever gotten tough with him? Sometimes people just need a good kick in the butt after the initial motivation wears off. I'm always gung-ho when I first start something, but then lose steam. That's when I could use someone telling me it's time to really start working.

One of the dumb, simple things that keeps me going is I print out a simple calendar for the year. It only has the months and days, no space for writing. Every day I exercise (at least 30 min.), I cross out that day. For some reason, putting Xs on that calendar is hugely motivational for me. It's at the family computer where everyone can see it too.

Sally,

I wholeheartedly agree with your 'inspire by your example' approach, but I am finding more and more that it actually provides me with a problem. Serious gym members love to see people a few steps ahead and aspire to be them, however, when seriously out of shape, seeing someone 'in shape' telling you what to do is proving de-motivating. It gets into that, 'you can do it, but I can't mentality'. I think in that respect they need to be around people just a few steps ahead, or even better, someone who was in their shoes 3 months ago and has improved maybe? Oh and a stone is 14 pounds. Random number I know? That makes him around 230 pounds.

Cindy,

I like your calendar idea very much, I think you're on to something there. Thanks for the tip. As for the 'tough approach', I'm always worried that people who are questioning themselves will buckle under pressure if you're too tough on them? Maybe I'm wrong with that one so I'll bear that in mind. I know I personally like to train myself and drive others military style, so I see the value in that.

Thanks again for both of your comments!!