Your main problem is that you rely too much on what other people think. In this country you're insane if you base your opinion of your physique on the opinion of others because, chances are, the people telling you look great are overweight themselves and don't know what it means to REALLY exercise and be IN SHAPE.

If you believe you can safely shed a few pounds, go for it. Who cares if others tell you you already look good?

well well well. look who it is.

I DON'T care what they think or say but it just gets so difficult to motivate oneself when people are constantly telling you that you don't need to change and that you're quite good as you are.

But this is a change I wanted for a long time and even though it's been a month of dieting and exercising, I'm still persisting, and not seeing many results but I'm still at it!

Yeah I know what you are saying about people saying you are fine no need to do anything.

Keep up the hard work. I am sure you will get there it takes time.

I know, it's just I was giving myself a month (which is reasonable to lose some weight and be leaner and more muscled) but I'm not seeing results, I'm just a lot more fit!

And my time is winding down and my goal was to accomplish this for my trip to Greece, and that's not happening! so I'm pretty upset about that, I've been upping my workouts recently which unfortunelty has been upping my calorie intake a lot more than it should (evil cakes that people are bringing over!)

Yeah, There have been months where I have hit a plateau and was at a standstill. It was really tuff for me to keep it going.

My issue is what I eat and drink. I now have that under control and am seeing progress just takes time.

I get the same thing, but I think it's mostly just loving concern. I've changed so much in the past ten months - the difference is a real shocker. My mom was just here for a visit and the first words she said when she saw me were "Okay. That's ENOUGH! Stop losing weight right now!" Then she was here for a week and saw how much I eat and took a closer look at the pounds still hiding on my thighs... She's not as worried anymore -but wants to be sure I'm not getting mental about it. Basically, that I can and will stop when I achieve my goal.

You know, the world doesn't see the flaws that we see. It's like when I sing a solo - I know every little mistake I made - but other people (unless they're trained singers) don't. Other people really don't spend time scrutinizing my figure to see where those last few pounds are hiding. And if they do, I'm worried about them! To the world, I look really good - especially for my age. But still, I'm with you all, I want to hit my goal for ME.

Yep!!

Look, when I was super skinny, I had everyone telling that I needed to gain weight and they weren't always nice about it either. Ironically, the same people who bashed me when I was underweight are the same people who pointed out how, FAT I got.

So, there's no winning. Do what's right for you and poop on everyone else ;)

I shall lol

Eww!

There is one more thing i would like to add here which might help you. You see, loosing weight (reaching YOUR BMI, body fat, being pleased with your jeans size, you name it) is not a goal which can be reached within a month, well, the numbers might but the acctual goal is to keep it that way. It is therefore a long time process. I assume you do not want to be BMI 19,5 and 1 week later you are 21 again. The thinking behind this is compareable to conqueer your cravings, that doughnut will be there the next day as well, so you do not miss out anything by saying no

You can usually go to a gym and have them measure your body fat if you don't want to go buy a caliper

Also, have a great time in Greece! Try not to worry too much about the food; traditional mediterranian cuisine is pretty healthy for you!

could I have them measure my body fat even if I'm not a member?....

Prob not, maybe but they would charge you?

charge you? at least thats the way it works at my gym...i should really get it measured, i can not even remember for sure but i think i was 20% right after Christmas

Jessi, I can totally relate! I was actually the underweight kid (and told that I had to eat more) until I hit university, and then my metabolism went for a nosedive. Now, it's my brother who is super-lean, and having just had a baby, I need to lose the weight. My problem now is that people actually tell me I have to eat less! But, my brother can eat anything he wants, and people cater to his tastes (pizza, chips and beer) instead of supporting my attempts to eat healthy.

I get something similar to this all the time - the old "you don't need to lose weight, you look fine" response. I am a pretty tall guy, so i tend to hide the weight pretty well. But when i hit 250lbs this year - i may have looked fine - but i wasn't feeling fine.

I don't think people realize that it isn't always worrying about the looks either that motivates people to lose (although i'm sure that's part of it). Alot of times people just want to feel better.

I've now lost 32 pounds and am 15 lbs from my goal.. All my clothes are starting to be too big!

Your family could also be saying that because they want you to know that they think you look great already. They're just trying to be supportive.

Why not tell them that you're appreciative of their compliments, but you want to get in bikini shape and you'd like it if they'd be supportive of that. And see what happens...

Oh man do I ever feel pressure from friends and family! I'm hesitant to add any Motivators to this site because I don't have anyone willing to support me!.. MAYBE my mother, but probably not..

Six years ago, in high school, I went through a brief anorexia stage (a year). It ended when I collapsed in front of my parents after climbing a little set of stairs (I would eat a cup of fruit loops and run for as long as I could every day). They forced me to see a doctor who convinced me I was hurting myself (up until then I couldn't see the damage (anemia) I was doing because all that was happening was me losing weight and looking better, or so I thought.. my lowest weight was 120, I couldn't get it under that, even if I didn't eat for days).

Anyway, since then, I've gone off to college, gained and lost a freshman 20 lbs, and now I just have another 15 - 20 pounds to lose before I am at what I consider to be my healthiest weight (around 130.. I am 5 foot 5.5). All my friends are aware of my flirtation with anorexia and are thus paranoid as shit that I'm counting calories again.

They also scoff at me for purchasing whey protein and multivitamins! All I want is to be healthy -- I refuse to just sustain myself with cheap "student food" like instant noodles, perogies, and pancakes (not to mention poutine and pizza). They tell me its a waste of money, etc etc.. well, until someone with a stellar body comes up to me and tells me I can look and feel great by eating that shit, I'm going to keep "wasting" my money on protein powder and vitamins!!

Anyhow, it's nice to find a group of people who understand -- I agree with a lot of you about the jealousy issue, actually.. both my roommates who scoff at my food purchases are overweight -- one only slightly (since coming to college), and the other one a lot. Well, I scoff at them for sacrificing their bodies for the sake of a few more pennies saved a month. Yeah pennies add up, but come on -- isn't health a little, tiny bit more important?

At risk of sounding like a social misfit with an "I don't care what any of you think" attitude (see Judd Nelson in Breakfast Club), you really have to tune people out that say things like that to you and just remind yourself that they don't matter (at least in this regard). Every single person that I've ever heard say anything like that to me, or anyone else, has self esteem issues. Some hide it better than others, but in actuality what they're saying isn't "You don't need to work out, you look great!" they're saying "You make me feel bad because I'm not doing anything/enough for myself." These people are trying to belittle your achievements and goals through negativity to validate their lack of achievements, although most of the time it's a subconscious response.

Think about the truly successful people (not necessarily financial or fitness wise, but the people you know who understand what true "success" is) you know in your life and try to imagine them being anything but encouraging if you tell them a goal, any goal. The people who know what it takes to set a goal and achieve it will only encourage you, because they don't need to validate themselves by your failures.

In other words: everyone wants to feel good about themselves; some people actually go out and do something to earn that feeling, other people try to bring the people around them down to feel superior. I imagine it like people trying to swim: there are the folks who put it on themselves to learn how to stay afloat, and there's the people who keep their heads above water by pushing down on other people. Eventually, the folks who depend on pushing other people down aren't going to have anyone around them and they're going under.

ok.
I tell you what I'm sick of.
my breasts.
they are hell of a lot of an handicap if it comes to exercising, even with the sports bra on.

pretty shallow, but yes, it is bothering me. men have it a lot easier, sigh...

and about people who tell you to lose weight and it's bothering you...

it depends who's saying that to you and how often. I know how fed up with that you can end up being, what I simply did was: I moved to another country and left my 'friends' behind.
Seems that in formerly I was called a 'fat kid' throughout years, I would say for about 8 years of my life, which is about 40% of my life? (just estimating).
however, don't stick to people who let you down. motivation is always good, but some people around you would judge you badly just to feel better about themselves. The trick is to be smarter and not to do that back, and stay strong.

I turned out to be a 'hot babe' (quotation of my fiance, not my words!), all the people who hadn't seen me for years feel embarrassed now for saying the things they had said. But frankly, I will never ever believe the mirror now, because I soaked so much bad info when I was just a little kid with no self esteem. Now it takes every singe day, every minute to reverse those feelings and to re-built myself. Don't let anyone do that to you. It may break your life.

sports bra and a vest top with one of those 'support panels' sewn in (the support panels that laughable claim to support but don't suport anything over a B cup) are what I use. The sports bra wicks the sweat away and the vest top keeps the bounce very much reduced. I'm a D to DD -cup so I can't speak for anyone over that but you look in your pic about the same as I am (though it's hard to tell, since Bras can do so much to promote or minimise what's there)

If you can't find vest tops with the support panels, then a vest that's a little small can do it, but not one in too thin/stretchy a fabric. I have another vest more like that as a back-up.

Your traineo pic implies you're rather happy with your bust though. so be aware that this bra/vest combo will make you look like a B cup since it's all squished flat to your chest. I always think I look very strange so flatchested when I run. I'm used to casting a bigger shadow

often when people tell you not to lose weight you can't take that as deliberate sabotage. What people mean is you don't NEED to lose weight. If you're in a healthy weight for your height then if you're losing weight it's because you WANT to not because you need to. People are just reminding you of that. Also they may worry you're wanting to lose weight you can't afford to lose. I was once underweight and thought I was overweight. It happens.



Also, I've met some people who become complete diet bores. They are patently skinny and yet groan at the sight of any calories and become obsessed with how they look and not getting fat. Anyone who is not overweight who says" i watch what I eat" as the dessert cart draws near will meet with a roll of the eyes from me. Not because they're dieting but because they're announcing it. I'm on a diet too but I don't tell the world about it (unless they ask me).

Yeah, the thing is I'm a pretty tiny person (small bones sturcture, ribcage) but my little friends are not so little (D cup). So, yes, I sympathize fully. Lifewould be so much easier with an A/B cup.
Some sports bra are simply not made for proper women, screaming out you are not meant to be exercising. Sometimes can be pretty discouraging
but well, woudln't be that interesting without having to fight with the world!

I was measured once and when the sales assistant said "well you're DD" I just about wanted to cry (where are the pretty bras in DD?!) and she qualified it by saying "it's because you've a narrow back. You could get away with a D with a larger chestband"

As to the sports bra, a colleague of mine (Also a DD) uses some massive bra cotnraption (it goes down almost to the waist) and it's pricey but she loves it She does all the bouncy aerobics and things. When I see her I'll ask who makes it. For me, I just use the sports bra and vest. And trying em on inthe cubicles is funny. I jump up and down to see how well the reduce bounce and then shimmy to see how well they reduce sideways jiggle.

there are pretty bras in D and DD and even E's and F's in this country, believe me.
in the country I come from, the size range ends at B.

Hahahah!

One word: testicles.

true, true. Definitly not good for sports like football and the like.

but as an avid long-distance cyclist, I sure do wish I had movable genitalia. My boyfriend doesn't have nearly the problems I do (it all moves out of the way) after 6 hours on a saddle. What saddle manufacturers call "soft tissue" is quite a problem as it's really not designed to be sat on.